I went to my dad's wedding today met my new step mom and step sister and brother and uncles and aunts and people I never knew on my dad's side of the family...my husband and kids didn't come to the wedding nor the reception which I think the reception would have been fine cause my nieces and nephews had a blast dancing with the loud music and stuff...Kay Kay my niece was missing her daddy who is serving the US army not sure where he is stationed at this point in time but I am going to go to their myspace and see later...I found out my Dad is 58 years old my sister Thursa is 34 my Brother Chad is 32 my sister Casey is 26 and my other Sister Ashley is 18...not sure on my nieces and nephews though also found that Casey had a baby Isic and I knew about Jordan...then there is Kay Kay and Bri Bri those are Thursa's little girls and then Misty and Tyler my brother Chad's little ones....so anyways it was a lot more fun than I expected. My new Step mom wants to get to know me and be there for me...she also lost a baby so thats something that we share in common...I hope she means it...She will be the first on that side of the family who took time to get to know me if she does hold to her word...so I am kind of excited...I am hoping she will keep me on my dad's mind and I can be more apart of the family...for that I am so excited.
I had fun we danced macarena and tried to do the thriller but I couldn't remember how to do it lol but we empravised we also did the cha cha slide and they were teaching how to do the jitter bug but I didn't have a partner but I got the just of it...it looks like fun...anyway...I am sore sore sore...from smiling for pictures and what was weird during the pictures my face started spazing like when your holding a huge amount of weight and your arms do that full body shake my face started doing that which was bizare to me....I don't understand it...so my face hurts, my back hurts, my knees hurt, my feet hurt, my arm pits hurt cause the dress my step mom bought me was too tight around my shoulders and bust...but anyway she tried and I wore it but changed after the wedding and pictures cause my arm pits couldn't take it anymore...the rest of the dress fit well at least....I could breath in it minus the tightness around my bust lol...never had this problem...oh well...it was the thought that counted and I appreciated it...the sisters and brothers met for lunch at 11 I was told 12 so I didn't plan to wake til 11 which when I did found out that it was at 11 out east I didn't show up til 11:45 or so then my sister Casey and I and Chad and Ashley and Caseys two kids went to jcpennys to get shoes for me and the boys and casey and ashley and I some hose...then also the baby an outfit...so yeah...my sister Casey was breast feeding her baby a lot of the time just whipping it out and bam ty ya ma'am which I am ok with but a lot of people didn't appreciate it cause she didn't use a blanket which would have been nice of her to do...then she left her baby by himself in the car while it was running once outside of the church and then the other time outside of dad's house...which made me mad but whatever...the reason being that she shund me for having my girls taken away believing about the drugs being involved and stuff...anyways she is a hypocrit...I never NEVER left my kids in a running car...nor left them out in the car I always brought them into the house with me if I forgot something...maybe thats why I lost my mind I don't know...anyways...she didn't know I had Josie either so...its kind of like we rarely talk and when we do one of us popped another kid out or something...my brother I didn't even know he had a baby girl then I didn't know he had a baby boy and well thats just crazy...I found out that he had a baby boy when Grandma gave me a gift with Tyler on the name tag and I asked and she said thats Chad's boy lol...so yeah its really me out of the loop with that family...but I picture it as this...they are getting together on a day then the day comes closer and (two days before the get together) and everyone asks did anyone ask Rabeka to come? and they of course didn't and run it by me and I always am busy doing something else...oh by the way my sister Casey was drinking margareta's at the on the boarder and she drove her two kids and breast fed her baby...uh yeah not smart but anyways...I was a horable mom and didn't deserve my kids back yet she got up on coke and mJ and ODed and was in the hospital and discharged herself against doctors orders and I am the bad mom...yeah I don't believe it...but ok whatever...anyways...yeah thats something that bugs me about her...
I really do hope that this new mom will bring me into the family more often...I was Dad's secret...no one knew about me til I showed up at 16 and 1/2...my brothers and sisters didn't know I existed...yeah...but Beverly his wife (casey and ashleys mom) knew about me but never mentioned me...the reason I think they didn't was cause Dad was so Godly and sex before marriage was blah blah blah and well here I was out of wedlock and uh his foot met his mouth pretty quick...after Thursa had Bri Bri she got the third degree from dad about how she shouldn't have sex before marriage blah blah blah and then bam there I was and she was so thankful cause it justified her...now Casey has had two out of wedlock babies...she claims they threw her into menopause cause she had endometriousis or something when she concieved her baby boy she had...I don't know whatever...so anyways...just alot of new info today...I am over joyed and over whelmed all at once...and they actually had me participate more...I was going to tell them to just forget I even existed but I felt actually welcomed for the first time in our gatherings...Dad danced with me, Thursa, Ashley, Casey, and my new step sister I forget her name cause its unique...I think...anyway....I am excited about this all...I think Suzanne my new step mom is going to be the new rock to the family and hold us together and get us closer and I can't wait to see what she does...her daughter says she is a control freak and all this other stuff...which I saw a little of it at the wedding cause you had to wear off white, marroon, or black for the wedding...my sister Casey wanted to wear her orange sweater...I don't know she is rebelious she had a dress to wear and she "forgot it" at her house...uh if you wanted her to wear it don't let her take it home...duh...but ok anyways...getting ready for the wedding was crazy...Casey was all let me try on your dress see if I like it...she tried it on but didn't want to wear it cause she couldn't wear her sports bra...then the other black dress that was picked for me wasn't able to zip on me but was too loose for her...anyway she ended up wearing what she originally picked out which was a off white blouse and black pants...anyways it was just crazy...and Casey and Ashley made it about them in the wedding preparation...thats them...I just put on the dress said it was tight but said I would deal with it...and they complained the whole time about theirs and stuff...anyways just tells you how different we are...dad's house was a wreck...which is expected cause he is used to having maid service...anyway...still lives in belair and nice house and nice cars and etc. I do NOT envy them...I hope things work out for them...they are going to the bahama's and if everyone has an extra 200 bucks they can go with them uh so Thursa is going with them on their honey moon to the bahama's ok...thats weird but ok...nice cruse...
Anyways just alot of information I learned tonight I am so sore my hips are really hurting me now...so I am going to hurry get email done and go to bed...cause I am tired...ttyl
Sincerely,
Rabeka Jo
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